Confession time… I was insanely nervous before every single session during my first year in my new photography business.
On the way to any shoot, my stomach was like a washing machine, tumbling around all the what-ifs. What if I forget all my poses? What if the weather gets worse? What if my camera stops working? And the worst one of all… what if they don’t like me?
It was loud in my head. The banging noise of fear and self-doubt. Even though my first season in business was financially successful and rewarding in many ways, I still found it hard to turn off the negative noise that we all tell ourselves, no matter what field we are in.
Who can relate? Have you had this experience in whatever job you do? The fear and the self-doubt always creeping in and making you believe something that is totally not true?
As time went on and this feeling became so familiar, I began to unravel what was actually going on by using my experience and knowledge of the enneagram. It was related to my motivation to be loved and worthy. As an Enneagram 2, I had a fear of unworthiness that leaves you open to rejection. And that is scary my friends! Can I get an amen?
Learning and processing the different ways that my enneagram two-ness affected me in business and life, helped me slowly defeat the self-doubt monster. I started realizing that every time I arrived at the shoot location, I instantly became settled when I saw my clients face. You would think it would be the opposite, right? Like I would become even more terrified? But no, I saw their face and instantly connected with my inner Beyoncé.
Why? Because PEOPLE are my jam. All the ‘what-ifs’ disappear because I get to work with people. An Enneagram Two is The Helper. We love helping and serving people. We perceive the needs of others and naturally rise up to serve their needs. Once I learned that my passion lies in people more than it lies in the actual art of photography, my confidence kicked in.
Over time I realized I had pushed away the fact that my clients CHOSE me. They chose me for a reason…. they liked my work, or they heard great reviews from a friend, or they knew I’d give them above & beyond service, aside from beautiful images.
On the drive to these sessions, I was only thinking about how I might fail them or not be successful. (That’s the enneagram wing 3 in me that I’ll save for another blog. Ha!) But instead, I should have realized my talent wasn’t only in poses or camera knowledge or all the other things that make me a great professional photographer… my talent was in the gift of serving people well.
I would love to coach you and help you uncover all the layers of your enneagram number so you can serve your clients from your strengths instead of worrying about your weaknesses.
If you’re a photographer, maybe it’s in the peaceful aspect you bring to that young mama of 3 whose kids are running wild at the family shoot….I’m looking at you 9’s.
Or maybe’s you bring trust and confidence to a crazy busy wedding day for the bride who is worried that things won’t run well….I’m looking at you 8’s.
How do you solve those moments of fear and lack of confidence? By learning your enneagram number and how to use it in your life, business and relationships. Click on the coaching tab above and let’s help you get to living your best life in all areas that matter to you.
Have a Beyoncé kind of week my friends!